Being an Adult

What exactly does “be an adult” mean? I was told today that I should "behave like and adult" because I "was one".... It had me perplexed because I actually thought I had been "behaving like an adult".  Perhaps I was wrong though.  So here are some examples of things adults have done or do so you can perhaps help me figure it out.

Should "being an adult" mean I am someone who

·         ducks in and out of traffic instead of using the pedestrian crossing

·          works in a halfway house and gives so much love to those around her

·         steals from other people when they are out of their home

·         refuses to take responsibility for their errors in judgement because of their celebrity status

·          drives within the speed limit and is more careful when they have passengers in their vehicle

·          thinks it’s fun to drive after a tonne of alcohol

·          bashes his or her loved one simply because they feel angry about the world or themselves

·         puts in a great deal of effort in the workplace every day

·         pushes through a crowd because they feel they are more important than everyone else

·         takes a dropped wallet to the police station because they feel it’s the right thing to do

·         cares for their elderly parents and/or grandparents on a daily basis

·          accepts they have a terminal disease and tries to fit as much living in before it’s too late

·         Is pleasant each day to those around them

These are just a few examples of some of the behaviour we hear about in the news and see every day.  So, what does it mean to “be an adult”?  I’ll leave that one up to you.

The Power of a Compliment

The world is an everchanging place and yet one of the most common things we humans continue to share is a complaint.  We just love to voice our angst at bad times, poor service, and unpleasant experiences.  What we frequently don't do after we voice our complaint is actually DO something about it.  To be honest, we are then contributing to the problem by not acting on what we have said.

I've been guilty of the above and began a campaign on myself awhile back to see if I could make a difference in a POSITIVE manner.  My biggest beef is customer service and the lack thereof in so many retail outlets, especially the chain ones.

As recently as yesterday and this morning I have set in place the seeds that I hope will make a difference.  In three instances the young people serving me where fantastic.  So I made a point of telling them how happy I was.  The instant change in their faces nearly hit me like a freight train on speed.  All three smiled, and not just a little one either.  Their faces beamed as though no one had ever complimented them before on their customer service in a good way.

In as much as people complain about the "young people" it is we "older" ones who need to re-inforce the positive rather than focus on the negative.  Just try it the next time you go somewhere and the person, young or older, treats you well.  See the difference it makes to their day and feel great that you had the power to help make that happen.

Taking a Leap of Faith

I was sitting out the front of my favourite cake and pie shop eating my lunch.  They make the most delectable food ranging from mouth-watering pastries to great sandwiches and rolls.  The pies they bake have a lovely thin crust which means you get more filling.  These beef and gravy pies are the best I’ve found in Melbourne and range from the basic to the curry.  The pasties are to die for and their sausage rolls don’t leave you burping yeast for hours after you ingest them.

I like their coffee too.  I’ve been in Melbourne long enough to know a good brew when I taste one.  The milk is never burnt and the beans used are high quality.  To top it off they are the friendliest group I’ve come across in ages which also why I frequent the joint.  I know their names and they remember every regular patron’s name (and there are many) along with mine.  In all it’s one of those rare gems that you make sure you polish and look after.

So, it’s sad when you overhear people who decide not to go in simply because of the cultural orientation of the staff behind the counter.  These guys had all but ploughed in through the door stopping short when they realised the ethnicity of these people.  I couldn’t help but ask them why they were suddenly hesitating if they hadn’t eaten there before. They had assumed the food would be "overpriced, terrible and of poor quality".   After a bit more friendly chat about the merits of trying something new I left it up to them to make the choice.  After all, they could have gone to any of the other places around the district.  None of which I will go back to, I might add.  The other places are staffed with skin colour and ethnicities that are a bit more accepted in mainstream society yet for me provided shoddy service, overpriced and poor quality food. 

Sometimes it’s great to look beyond our fears and take a leap of faith.  The irony is that whilst these two men were worried about inferior quality meat in the pies and possible food poisoning they failed to understand their responsibilities for themselves.  You see one was obese and the other was a smoker.

To FIGJAM or Not to FIGJAM

The whole idea that all people should be treated “the same” is simply the silliest thing I’ve ever heard.  After working with the general public for as long as I have (and we won’t go there just yet lol) I can tell you that it’s far better and more productive if you treat someone in a manner that will “gain the best from them”.  That means taking notice of their general demeanour from the moment you first make eye contact.  I can now tell within a nanosecond what character type I’m dealing with when I call out a name in the waiting room.  It’s actually funny really because most people don’t even realise their body is telling the truth that they try to hide. 

The most fun are the overtly arrogant strangers; you know the ones who feel by their address, nationality, job status or FIGJAM status that they are simply way above the rest of us plebs.  Its fun and it’s cute since whilst they are carrying on like a pork chop about how important they are things will happen to them that they don’t expect or realise.  For instance, in a restaurant getting poor service and perhaps even food tampered with.  No one wants spittle in their burger... or worse.  Even more crazy than that is they miss out on a new experience with a new person.  Here is an opportunity to start afresh since the person they meet does not know anything about their past and hence won’t judge them like those who do.

So the next time you meet a stranger in retail or hospitality etc take the time to realise that they may actually like who you are for those moments you spend in their company.  Shake off the pretence, relax, and be polite and pleasant.  Or you may wish to be as arrogant as you want to be as long as you can wear the consequences.  After all, whilst you are being caught up in your own self importance the rest of us are out having the time of our lives. 

Queen of Silly – Episode 876.333333333333

I think I may have broken my brain.  I just can’t seem to work the touchpad on my mobile phone at the moment and consequently I post comments on facebook or send text messages that really don’t say what I’ve wanted to.  The latest one was to a fellow muso and I had wanted to say “kick ass tonight” and instead it decided that what I really meant was “kiss ass”.  

To be honest I roared laughing when I saw my latest faux pas and maybe that’s why they happen.  Perhaps we need a bit more hilarity in our lives given the chaos that surrounds us.

So prepare yourselves for more impromptu silliness from the queen of silly.  I guess that’s also one of my gifts to the world.  I don’t mind really; costs little and gives so much...... so I’m told

Newton's third Law and Friendship

We all know when a friendship ends; most of us resist it and keep trying to maintain it.  These days I feel that is akin to resuscitation on a corpse that is long cold.  So why do we do it?  Is it because we feel some kind of principle is involved?  The “how dare they” not want to be friends with us anymore?  Or is it that we simply feel the need to not be alone because we see that as being lonely?

I used to try to hang on to friends in the hope they would stop being “reactive” (ie the only contact from them was when they were contacted by me first).  I now realise that is just not healthy.  It can also hold you back from meeting potentially better and more suitable friends because you are forever spending your energy on people who are not really interested in returning that energy to you.

Friendship really should be like Newton’s third Law, which shows a certain amount of balance.  It states that for every action in nature there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Being alone is not lonely, but being alone in a “friendship” is.  I’m glad I’ve taken the leap of faith and moved on.  The universe has rewarded me for my courageous choice; and it will do the same for you if you ask it.

Believe we are Magic

Music is probably the most emotionally driven art form that reaches the masses.  A piece of music, whether instrumental or song, can make you cry or lift you up.  It can influence your mood in so many ways.

When you think about what will capture a massive amount of appeal it’s not an easy feat to write a hit song.  It has to have something in it for everyone and considering how unique we are on a DNA level it’s amazing to think one bunch of noise vibrations and frequencies mixed together with rhythm can appeal.  So when a song is written that is infectious there will be those around who dismiss it.  They will tout it as being “fluff” and “not real music”. 

For me, I like what I like and I’m not really that influenced by what anyone thinks.  The second album I bought when I was a teen was Icehouse by The Flowers (Iva Davies).  The third album I bought was by the Police – Regatta de Blanc.  For a long time I would tell people about those two because they were far more accepted albums than the soundtrack to XANADU.  That was the first album I ever saved for.  Years later I still love the music of Jeff Lynne and John Farrar and am not ashamed to say it.  That album and the movie copped a great deal of flak yet I loved both.  The movie was great because I loved Gene Kelly and the music was fabulous because I loved ELO and Olivia.

On Monday night I had the privilege to be in the fourth row at Olivia Newton John’s concert at the Regent Theatre.  The place was packed and a testament to her appeal.  We all sang along and clapped and cheered.  Here I was on a Monday night out being entertained.  I loved every minute of it. From the sheer joy in her face to the pitch perfect notes emanating from her body Olivia gave us everything.

I’ve barely slept.  I’ve managed to work a full week and be out at two great concerts.  Both have merit even though they were at totally different ends of the music spectrum. 

I love that my appreciation of music art is wide.  I think it will, in the long run, enable me to be a better songwriter.  How cool is that?  It’s Magic!